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我不知道两个人该如何相爱

【艾利♀】Letter (Eng.)

英文版可爱!!^q^

Ragnarok:

*感谢 @maggie's home 的授权,原文在此

*高中生水平渣翻,最好不要人身攻击←重要!








Dear X,

How are you? I am your father. Maybe it sounds a little bit weird, for I am only 17 years older than you but... I am still to be your father.

Your showing up is absolutely an accident, but will never be a mistake. Just as old saying goes, you are a gift from God. Honestly though, I have no faith in those God or something. But whatever, I still feel thrilled about your coming. It does not mean that I am obsessed with little kids, but the moment that I know about your existence, I had a strong feeling that I had already become a MAN so that I am able to shoulder another young life. This is sacred and solemn, even much more amazing than swearing under the national flag in the police academy. I do not think I am mature enough to be a FATHER, but I am still willing to and would invest my everything to take responsible for it, for learning to be a parent. This sort of guts and willpower are probably the only advantages I possess, which is your mother always says.

Of course, it is your mother's decision to keep you. Actually, I did not know anything about your existence until you turned 2 months old in that tiny dark world. I was busy looking for your mother then, since she left me even without a goodbye, as if she had never shown up in my life, and this really drove me crazy. Her friend, a science freak with a pair of exaggeratedly framed glasses, who you will meet in the future for sure, telling me that she was okay but she did not want me to go on chasing after her. I almost gave up at that time, since I was raised by her and it nearly had become my instinct to follow every order from her. But eventually, I still continued searching.

Because I had a strong premonition that she would fade away from my world forever once I quit it. It would also become impossible for me to meet you. But in the end, of course, I found her. She was then living in a city far far away from here. I had tried all methods to get access to her top leader in the SWAT team (That's right. She is a police officer. A super amazing police officer. Feeling proud? So did I, and that was the reason for my joining police academy), and I finally got to know that he, the leader, had dispatched her to a remote, I-would-never-find place. Soon after our reunion, I finally heard about your existence--thus, she wanted to leave me, and give birth to you secretly.
 
I was rather furious. I got mad at her disbelief of me. Was she just thinking that I would hope to abort you: her, my, our kid? She did all these for the sake of me, I knew and understood her thoroughly. She refused to trust me would spend my spare life with her, a woman 10 years older than me. She also held the thought that It was too early for me to accept the fact that I was to be a father. Well, as for the latter, I had to admit, that I was not well-prepared as I predicted at that moment(but now the preparation is all completed, so please come to us). But the former, had been already established before I turned 15. So I got extraordinarily angry, understanding clearly my lacking persuasiveness to some extent though, still shouted out loud at her. It was the very first time for me to treat her in this way (and it was all because of you). She was overwhelmed (and I just had my first sight of her such helpless expression), and then she sighed, compromised, promising me that she would be back. Yet the very prerequisite was that I should continue staying in the police academy until my graduation and not care too much about her, besides, marriage could not be taken into account in these years.

I did not have a second choice. Legally, I am still several years younger for marriage. It means your birth will not be admitted by laws, which upsets me terribly. We feel exceedingly guilty for it--me especially. But please do not feel being treated unfairly because of your identity. We will not let it hurt you. Never.

Well, now you know how on earth you have become one of our family. Next, let me give you some guidances after birth.

I, without question, will be always ready to playing with you, regardless of your gender of course. But when talking about your mother... I do not doubt that you will be trained to bathe yourself as well as clean up your own room as soon as you are able to walk by her. But there is also an another possibility that you have perfectly generated your mother's gene, and you will be happy to do some cleaning as you creeping on the floor... Well, forget it. On the contrary, if you have not, please do try your best to do the cleaning with me. She is so obsessed with cleaning that she will never allow the existence of a tiny bit of dust. In such situations, we will have to redo it. But do not worry. It sounds terrifying though(it is terrifying in fact), there are still numerous tricks of effective cleaning-up. I will teach you then. (You do not have to keep them as secrets, for they are tricks for cleaning, not for being lazy.)

Although she may seemed to be tough, she is still quite reasonable. I had been taken care by her for approximately two years since I turned 7. (She was in her 20s, but you can hardly tell the changes of her in these years except the length of her hair... Can you imagine how surprised I was when I saw her again a decade later?) There were many occasions that I thought I would be punished but in the end, she did not. However, do not expect that she will spoil you unconditionally--If you do have done something really really bad, she will kick you to death as well, even it is you. Under that circumstance I will be unable to shelter you... for sure. After all, she is the legend of her team! When I was 17 (it did happen in recent years), she kicked off one of my teeth. Until now, the crack between teeth is still there, and the pain is the very thing that I will remember for good. The wrestle training in PTD seems to be nothing in comparison with your mother's punishment, at least from the angle of intensity. So, just follow your mother's order. It is the rule of life in our home. (Her requests are usually reasonable, but if they are not, do tell her or just turn to me. If your opinion sounds better, let's just persuade her. Just as I have said, she is still quite reasonable.)

Plus, do not forget to prepare her presents for certain occasions like Mothers' Day or some time else. She does not really care about it, but she will be satisfied if having received gifts. (She tend to not express her feelings but do not give up--you will observe them when you grow up.)

Let me see if there's something missing. Ah, that's right. Let's talk about something about you. She and I will not set up a specific goal for you to achieve. You do not have to follow us to become a policeman in the future (But I will be extremely happy if you are willing to! It is amazing to be a policeman! And she will absolutely be happy, though she always blocks her feelings). If you choose to turn to go in for academic research, Armin and that freak (but God knows what she would teach you so be sure to let us accompany you) are both suitable to give you some instructions. But there is one thing you should always remember: Whenever it is, you always need to take the responsibility of your choice, and be prepared of paying your everything as a price. We hope you can pick up a career that is worth your entire life's devotion. And if possible, we hope you can find a person like this as well. As for me, the career means becoming a police officer, to deport villains from this world; the very person certainly is your mother. But as for yours, it is all up to you.
 
Anyway, please come. We are both waiting for you.




From
Your Father
 
Eren Jaeger

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